Conan Chop Chop, the stick figure roguelike from game developer Mighty Kingdom, will release on March 1st, 2022. Announced on April Fools Day in 2019, the game was unsurprisingly misunderstood as a prank. After a long journey through development and several delayed launches, Conan Chop Chop will be available to play on PC, Xbox, PlayStation, and Switch.
The game begins with a cheeky cinematic, introducing the villainous Thoth-Aman as he attempts (and fails) to summon the evil sorcerer Xaltotun. Xaltotun needs a triumphant, courageous heart to be fully restored, and Thoth-Aman decides to hold a "Wrath-a-thon" to weed out the mightiest warriors in the age of Hyboria (via trail by combat). From there, players can choose from one of four heroes, who are all cuter than even the cutest starter Pokémon: Belit, Pallantides, Valeria, and Conan the Barbarian himself.
After another equally humorous cinematic, players are dropped into the starting village, outside of Thoth-Aman's battle colosseum. Its gates are locked, with four unique seals on the door. Players will find only one way in: conquer all four of Thoth-Aman's champions in a single run. This means that preparation is key for any and all players: the game can be played solo, or with online and local co-op, and each unique fighter brings their own stats and skills to the skirmish ahead. Playing alone guarantees the best loot all to yourself, but risks a more punishing grind through the gauntlet. Playing with friends turns the challenges down and the on-screen chaos way up.
Conan Chop Chop is yet another charming entry in a long history of roguelike games. Each game's maps and enemies are randomly generated on every run, and players gradually gain XP that help unlock crucial, character-unique survival skills. Each run is filled with dangerous wildlife, violent slimes, and vicious barbarians. Players can discover shops along the way that sell better resources, making it easier to progress. When all players die, they return to their village and have to attempt to triumph against all four of Thoth-Aman's champions in a single run again. More runs mean more XP, better skills, and higher-tier loot, taking players one step closer to Thoth-Aman's impending "treasures."
Boss battles feel challenging, fun, and are not overly difficult. Each boss has a substantial health bar, divided into three phases. As long as one player survives the phase, all other players are revived for the succeeding phase, keeping the frustration low and camaraderie high. By the time the party has reached the boss area, players have amassed an outfit of improved armors, weapons, and charms that grant gameplay buffs. These buffs could be as simple as dropping a bomb after shooting an arrow, or as charming as a "slimey boy" that attacks enemies and scavenges hats from its victims. Battle ensues, and stick-figure chaos unfolds.
While the game retains key rogue-like elements in its execution, Conan Chop Chop truly excels in its execution of simple, stick-figure recreations of the heroes, villains, and settings in the age of Hyboria. Conan Chop Chop isn't set to redefine roguelike storytelling like Hades, but does set itself apart from other roguelikes on pure charisma and dedication to a delightfully simple art style. When combined with simple action combat, a deceptively complex progression system, and a sly sense of humor throughout, it all makes for an enjoyable, casual party game. Whether Conan the Barbarian is tackling the dungeons on his own, or surrounded by his Hyborian compatriots, Conan Chop Chop is adorable, chaotic, and all-out fun.
Conan Chop Chop releases on March 1, 2022 for PlayStation 4, PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X/S, Xbox One, Nintendo Switch, and PC. Screen Rant was invited to a press presentation for the purpose of this preview.
