My partner’s addiction to video games is destroying our relationship

DEAR DEIDRE: OUR relationship is being destroyed by my partner’s addiction to gaming.

I’m 40, he’s 43 and we’ve been together for eight years. Three years ago he had a back operation and everything changed.

It left him in terrible pain and he went off sick from work.

He started playing video games to help take his mind off the pain but I fear he’s now become addicted.

He’s up playing all hours of the night, never comes to bed and sleeps until noon.

We have no sex life any more and he won’t discuss it.

Worse, he has just told me that he doesn’t have the money for the post-coronavirus holiday we planned, to visit family in Italy.

After he told me, I was so upset and suspicious that I checked his bank statement.

I saw he’d spent all his money on gaming equipment – useless things like virtual weapons. I feel betrayed.

How can I help him and save our relationship?

DEIDRE SAYS: You need to let him know how unhappy you are and that you are worried about him.

Ask him to speak to his doctor to see what can be done to improve his pain.

He can also get help from painconcern.org.uk, which works to improve the lives of people living with pain, or call them on 0300 123 0789.

If talking doesn’t help, you may need counselling together.

Find support through tavistockrelationships.org, who have online help available, or call on 020 7380 1960.

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