They refuse to put a label on the relationship. If they aren’t comfortable referring to you as their partner, then they probably won’t treat you like a partner. They probably won’t introduce you to others as anything more than a friend. They probably won’t give you the type of respect you deserve.
They refuse to delete their dating apps. If they’re serious about you, they won’t want anyone else. They won’t be tempted to message their exes or any old matches on dating sites. If they refuse to stop flirting with others, then they aren’t committed to you. They’re all too comfortable hurting you.
They refuse to introduce you to their friends and family. They might not want to bring you around family right away, but if they’re serious about you, it shouldn’t be that long until you get introduced to their loved ones. If they want you to be a permanent part of their life, then why wouldn’t you get to know their friends and family?
They refuse to open up to you about basic facts. Some people have high walls. It might take them a while to talk to you about their trauma, but they shouldn’t be hiding basic facts. If they’re keeping you at an arm’s length because they’re terrified of opening up to you, they aren’t ready for a commitment yet. They need to work on their trust issues first.
They refuse to apologize. When they hurt you, they don’t take responsibility for their actions. They don’t put in the work to explain why they made a mistake and try to make you feel better. They simply ignore the problem–or worse, they try to turn the situation around on you and blame you instead.
They refuse to compromise. In order to make a relationship work, you need to act as teammates. You can’t go against each other. You need to work alongside each other. If this person refuses to compromise with you, and doesn’t even want to hear what you have to say, then they aren’t ready for a relationship.
They refuse to take no for an answer. If you aren’t in the mood to have sex, they shouldn’t pressure you to change your mind. They shouldn’t make you feel uncomfortable or guilty or selfish. If they can’t take no for an answer, they aren’t ready for a respectful, committed relationship.
They refuse to stay present with you. Your partner should be there for you emotionally and phsyically. They shouldn’t be staring at their phone while you’re speaking. They shouldn’t be canceling plans every weekend. They should be there whenever you need them. If they can’t even pay attention to you during a date, they definitely don’t deserve your time.
They refuse to put effort into you. A relationship won’t last if only one person is putting in effort. You both need to be doing your share. If they refuse to put in any work, then they aren’t ready for a serious commitment. They aren’t anywhere near good enough for you.
