THE Covid pandemic hit Taraji P. Henson exceptionally hard, as she admits to having many negative thoughts and even contemplating suicide.
The actress spoke candidly today about her mental health during an interview with Dr. LaShonda Green via her Facebook Watch show Peace of Mind.
She told the professional that she was in a “dark place” and “couldn’t get out of bed” during the outbreak.
The Empire star revealed that she thought about “ending it all” and that the thoughts appeared two nights in a row.
Taraji shared that she had purchased a gun not too long ago, and although it was locked away in a safe, in her depressive moment she recalled thinking “I could go in there right now, and just end it all, cause I just want it to be over.”
The 50-year-old explained that although she thought briefly of her son, her unhealthy mental state argued that he was “grown” and that he would be “get over it.”
She felt herself “withdrawing” from friends and family as people called her and she “didn’t care” to answer them.
The mother-of-one debated the pros and cons of telling friends about her mental state, as she shared she didn’t want them to think she was “crazy.”
After two nights in a suicidal state, she began crafting a “plan” and detailed her shift in thinking “about going to get the gun.”
When Taraji was finally able to share her deepest feelings with a close one, she revealed feeling “so much better.”
During the interview, the actress broke down in tears and got very emotional as she shared her experience, and the medical professional validated her mental state.
She also shared clips from a previous interview with singer Tamar Braxton, 43, who also claimed she was close to taking her own life.
Taraji’s friend tearfully explained that she felt her son Logan, now 7, would be “better off without her” causing her to make the decision.
The R&B artist disclosed: “Logan was the reason why I made that decision. I just felt like he deserved better. I felt like I was embarrassing him, being a fool on TV.”
“Because I knew that’s not what my whole life really was. That’s not who I was. I didn’t want him to be embarrassed in front of his friends.
“Here is this loudmouth ghetto mama,” she closed.
In July of this year, Tamar was found unresponsive by her boyfriend David Adefesco at the Ritz Carlton Residences in downtown Los Angeles.
David called 911 and she was rushed to the hospital by an ambulance.
On The Tamron Hall Show, she revealed “she’s good” now, despite the incident which she claims was an “attempt to end my pain and my life.”
“I was living a complete lie, a facade that I was ok for a long time. But I’m good now – better than yesterday, better than I was before,” she rationalized.
“I just have a scope of where I’m going and it’s just up from here because I know the struggles that I’ve had and I’ve learned from them.
She continued: “I’ve learned the signs of when I’m not ok so I’m good now.”
The Braxton Family Values star felt she was living a “facade” while on the show, and was hopeful that her spinoff Get Ya Life! would be more a positive view of her life.
When the show’s vision changed due to exposure of her darkest secrets including sexual assault, the negative spin took a toll on the star.
