I lost my husband to the shed and his porn habit & I am left sexually frustrated
DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband started spending a lot of time in the shed a year ago.
He’d disappear off down there after work until late in the evening.
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We’d hardly see each other and our sex life, which was OK, went to zero.
I’d caught him using porn before so I started looking for clues and discovered he was pleasuring himself on a sex-chat line.
I was so angry I thought about getting a lover but realised that wouldn’t be right. Then I confronted my husband.
He admitted it straight away and said that the problem was he was struggling with his erection, and that’s why there was no sex in our marriage.
I don’t think he’s cheated on me as he’s always at home, but what do I do now? I’m sexually frustrated and want to be enjoying a sex life.
We’re both in our forties.
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DEIDRE SAYS: There’s lots that can be done as long as your husband is willing to be honest with you and make an effort.
It could be that he’s experiencing erection problems because of the pornography and sex-chat lines he’s been using, as both can tend to numb sexual responses.
So he must commit to stopping using them, and to see his GP in case the erection issue is a symptom of a health problem that needs treating.
My e-leaflet on Solving Erection Problems explains self-help sex therapy and medical treatment.
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