When my partner goes to see his children, he has sex with his ex
DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my partner goes to see his children, he has sex with his ex.
He’s 42 and says he doesn’t love her, but his children need to see him regularly. We live in a tiny one-bedroom flat so there’s no room for them to come here. They’re only a couple of miles away so it felt OK, even during lockdown.
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I’m 25 and I love him. I’ve never made waves about him seeing his kids. But we had a row one day before he went to see them and he stayed over there for three days.
When he got back he admitted he and his ex had had sex. We got over that but he went to see his boy for his tenth birthday and ended up staying there for four days.
He’s a lovely, considerate guy when he’s with me but I’m sick of his other life.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Be clear he is on his last chance, but he has got you compartmentalised and it could help if you could spend some time with his children.
Tell him you want to get to know them, which you need to do if your relationship is serious. You can take them out for a picnic together. If he resists, that will tell you volumes about the role you really play in his life.
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