JOE Lycett – who has changed his name to Hugo Boss in protest at the fashion brand – presents BBC’s The Great British Sewing Bee.
From love and sex to pain, the comedian, 31, opens up to Fabulous Magazine.
What scares you?
An alarm that goes off before 11am. I love sleeping. I don’t like to be vertical.
What’s your favourite word?
Autumn. It feels like a warm hug, doesn’t it?
What’s your worst habit?
Biting my fingernails. When I was filming The Great British Sewing Bee, I painted my nails and that stopped me. As a child, I used to bite my toenails, which is grim. I can still do it.
Who or what is the love of your life?
Making things. I love painting. I love writing. I love creating and being around people who are creating.
What’s your earliest memory?
I used to sing classical music to the flowers in the garden and imagine they were all different parts of the orchestra. It used to really annoy the neighbours.
What was your fave kids’ TV show?
As a teen, I always watched Will & Grace. I had every episode on DVD – I loved it!
If you could travel back in time, where would you go?
It’d be fun to watch one of the mad kings, such as Henry VIII, but I’d also love to see what my parents – David and Helen – were like as kids.
Who would you invite to a dinner party?
My mum, dad, sister, her fiancé and a few pals. I keep inviting Alison Hammond for lunch and, a few days before, she keeps saying she’s got to go off filming for This Morning. I just want her to turn up to one f**king roast.
Who’s your celebrity crush?
The singer Dua Lipa is stunning. I’m really obsessed with her at the minute. And I love the presenter Ben Shephard. Gorgeous.
How often do you have sex?
Not enough. Very rarely.
Do you have a party trick?
I do a very good impression of Louis Armstrong. [Singing] I see trees of green, red roses too…
What’s the worst pain you’ve experienced?
When I broke my elbow in September 2016. I discovered my response to pain – physical and mental – is to laugh. I’d go: “Aah!” and start laughing. I don’t know why, I was totally sober, I was just laughing my tits off.
What song would you have played at your funeral?
Something with a Lycett pun. Maybe as the casket’s being dropped into the ground, I’d play Drop It Lycett Hot!
What possession would you rescue from a burning building?
Comedian Noel Fielding gave me a cool chair with David Bowie on it when I was on Taskmaster. I would prise that out of the house.
Who would you like to apologise to?
All the people who put up with me before I did stand-up and I was just really irritating, trying to show off and make people laugh. I’ve mellowed considerably.
And the poor neighbours who had to listen to me singing to the bloody flowers
in the garden.
