Even after 30 years since its premiere, Seinfeld fans can’t get enough of Jerry’s lovable, but diabolical, sidekick, George Costanza and his antics. In the relationship department, never has a man done so much with so little. Over the course of the show, George managed to date over thirty women. He is more or less the perennial hapless loser to Jerry’s winning and charming person. Only in Sitcomland could a complete miscreant like George not only exist but thrive.
But this is Seinfeld and “thrive” is a relative term on a show when everyone is a neurotic wild person seemingly only out for themselves. As far relationships go, most of “Biff’s” girlfriends are almost as big a maniac as he is! From the woman who needs to pronounce everyone’s full name and says “Papia Mache” instead of Papier Mache, all the way to a woman who eerily resembles Jerry, and all point in between, here are 10 of George Costanza’s girlfriends, ranked.
George is having a rough go of finding a job and Mrs. Sokol at the unemployment office is getting very pushy about George having a job. In an attempt to gain favor with Mrs. Sokol, he asked about dating her daughter Carrie.
Played by the late Carol Ann Susi (The Big Bang Theory), Carrie is not the most attractive woman George has ever dated, nor pleasant. But it’s always funny to watch George squirm and weasel his way into and out of situations.
Little did she know about George’s paranoia that Cheryl hears Jerry be funny, she’ll instantaneously become more attracted to Jerry and dump George. This led to Jerry acting like a depressing and dark emo guy, which only made Cheryl like him more.
Played by the future Dr. Cuddy (House’s Lisa Edelstein), Karen showed up in Georgie’s life not once but twice. First, she’s in “The Mango,” and George is worried she’s faking it. Especially after hearing that she’s normally “full after the risotto.”
Even though he was able to work past that, when she showed up a few episodes later in “The Masseuse,” George developed a crush and Jerry’s masseuse girlfriend, Jodi. Her complete disdain for him is what turns him on. He almost immediately dumps Karen for a mere shot at Jodi.
What will George do to get a date and then keep a relationship afloat? Like a lot of people, he’s willing to convert to his girlfriend’s religion of Latvian Orthodox. In “The Conversion,” not only does George plan on converting, but he cheats on his test. Things start looking even better for Georgie when his parents vehemently disapprove.
After finally converting and letting Sasha know, she tells George that she’s heading to Latvia to live with family.
Seinfeld has a slew of memorable and quotable lines over the course of the series, but the show’s most memorable and quotable story comes thanks to a chance meeting with Jerry and an old friend, Diane. For whatever the reason, he thought to tell Diane that Georgie became a marine biologist.
George did his best to lie, but when “the sea was angry that day...” in that moment, George was a Marine Biologist and he was able to save a whale’s life before telling Diane the truth and getting dumped.
Two things happened in “The Little Kicks.” The first was getting to see Elaine dance. The other was seeing George’s so-called bad boy side. It all began when he tried to get a date with Anna, one of Elaine’s coworkers but she wasn’t giving him the time of day.
Because of her dancing, Elaine’s employees lost all respect for her, she wrongly thought it was because she brought George to the party. When she warned Anna about him, she instantly became attracted to the bad boy she thought George was.
When George’s girlfriend Marcy talks, her frequent use is the term “Yada, Yada” makes him think that’s how she refers to her spending time with the ex, “Yada Yada and I’m real tired today.” George then tries to use the phrase to refer to how Susan died.
When confronted about it, Marcy explains to George that she’s not Yada yadaing sex, Yada yadaing her shoplifting habit.
A random person asks George to watch his bag. That and the combination of George looking at a map, leads NY Visitor Center employee, Mary Anne to think George is a tourist. Rather than dissuade her, Georgie goes with it and tells her he’s from Arkansas and works for the Tyler Chicken company.
He keeps the act up just to be able to date her and offers to move to New York, even though Mary Anne thinks the city will eat him alive. But he winds up having his real Yankee boss and fake Tyler boss competing for his employment.
But the aforementioned betrayal is George finding out that Jerry and Nina had a fling long before she and George started dating. Meanwhile, Nina only was dating Georgie was to get a free trip to India.
After Kramer vomited on her, Susan still didn’t mind dating George. Part of the reason George and Susan’s relationship was so funny was watching George try to find new and exciting ways to get out of the marital hell he wrought upon himself.
It's clear that she barely liked him and he only wanted to marry her because of some silly pact with Jerry that he didn’t even bother to keep.
