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The internet is awash in conspiracy theories, the most outlandish of which tend to never slink outside the confines of Reddit and 4chan and the like. But one thing turned everyone into a conspiracy crackpot, and with good cause: The news Saturday morning of Jeffrey Epstein’s death by alleged suicide.
The wealthy financier, who had been arrested on numerous counts of sex trafficking involving underage women, was reportedly found dead in his jail Saturday morning. Sources claimed it was a suicide. But the instant the news broke, just about everybody on Twitter suspected foul play.
Epstein had reportedly been on suicide watch following an earlier incident in late July, in which he’d been found unconscious in a fetal position, with marks on his neck. It wasn’t clear if it was self-inflicted, and many doubted they were.
Epstein was astonishingly well-connected, and names of associates who had been to his party or flown in his plane — dubbed “the Lolita Express” — were many and of unimaginable power. Among those named as possible accomplices: Bill Clinton, Prince Andrew, Alan Dershowitz, and Donald J. Trump. The latter had even been accused, back in 2016, of raping a 13-year-old at one of Epstein’s parties.
As such, conspiracy theories came instantly, flooding social media and drowning out any frivolous trending topics, and, in a way, uniting a divided nation. After all, everybody, liberal or conservative, Democrat or Republican, can agree that this smells fishy.
Some stuck to the facts.
Jeffrey Epstein died of an ‘apparent suicide’.
He was under suicide watch.
He was monitored 24/7.
NEVER underestimate the power of powerful people, over other powerful people, to deceive powerless people pic.twitter.com/o3PMd3BQE7
— Abraham Cavazos (@cavazus) August 10, 2019
Yes, Seth Abramson launched into one of his patented super-threads.
EPSTEIN FACTS
1) He told a journalist that for years he and Trump were "best friends"
2) He told a journalist he underwrote Trump's purchase of Mar-a-Lago
3) An associate told a journalist that Trump *went to Epstein's home* on 12/24/17
4) There are signs he managed cash for MBS— Seth Abramson (@SethAbramson) August 10, 2019
Many simply cried BS.
Hey, did Jeffrey Epstein commit suicide? He was on suicide watch. Impossible. was he murdered by his rich and powerful freinds?
— Norm Macdonald (@normmacdonald) August 10, 2019
Didn’t Jeffrey Epstein already try to kill himself in jail once before? If so, why wasn’t he on suicide watch under 24-hour surveillance? #EpsteinSuicide pic.twitter.com/wzIDFuUdRw
— Brittany Pettibone (@BrittPettibone) August 10, 2019
Jeffrey Epstein somehow committed suicide despite being under suicide watch… hmmmpic.twitter.com/QsfXdyyWgj
— abbie (@absinners) August 10, 2019
When you turn on the news and see "JEFFREY EPSTEIN IS DEAD FROM APPARENT SUICIDE" … pic.twitter.com/g4myG7Nw00
— Rob Jakatt (@jab_rokatt) August 10, 2019
https://twitter.com/joeheenan/status/1160200041799278592
Hmmm. Epstein commits suicide. pic.twitter.com/3yXhxoSGhL
— Lemon (@average_genius) August 10, 2019
Others came up with their own original theories.
the conspiracy theorist inside me fully believes that Epstein is not dead but on an island somewhere still being a sick fuck.
— jeremy bearimy (@crissles) August 10, 2019
Some even joked about the conspiracy theories.
Twitter reacts to Epstein news pic.twitter.com/THybyPcUSl
— Ireland Simpsons Fans (@iresimpsonsfans) August 10, 2019
There were also a lot of “I’m not a conspiracy theorist,” but chants.
Get the fuck outta here with this fake suicide bullshit #epstein pic.twitter.com/WQRR36vtuk
— ErikRHarris (@Dwaynesundrwrld) August 10, 2019
Pretty sure how Jeffery Epstein’s previous conviction was administered is proof that not all conspiracy theories are crackpot.
— Schooley (@Rschooley) August 10, 2019
There were also a lot of jokes about how all the Epstein associates were reacting to the news.
*alan dershowitz sweating bullets*
“OP-ED: Why with Epstein’s non-suspicious death we should definitely stop investigating this now”
— Mike Drucker (@MikeDrucker) August 10, 2019
bill clinton, trump and dershowitz when they wake up to the epstein news pic.twitter.com/mRM2UDlYgY
— patrick (@patmahogna) August 10, 2019
The political elite when they see that Jeffery Epstein “committed suicide” overnight pic.twitter.com/EgEZeFTDj7
— Troy Moss (@t_roymoss) August 10, 2019
rich politicians waking up across america this morning to find out that Epstein “killed himself” and cant snitch: pic.twitter.com/FMAQdDWCz1
— madz (@maddyackerburg) August 10, 2019
Of course, everyone could be wrong and Epstein really did commit suicide in his jail cell while awaiting an almost certainly lengthy prison sentence for crimes he may have committed. Still, with Epstein gone, anyone who may have joined him in his actions may go uninvestigated, unpunished.
Epstein's death means that there won't be a public trial or other proceedings that could reveal evidence of his wrongdoing. Evidence collected via grand jury subpoena won't be released to the public.
— Renato Mariotti (@renato_mariotti) August 10, 2019
There were also calls to ensure that doesn’t happen.
Epstein's death should not end the investigation into the unusual plea deal he received from former labor secretary Alex Acosta.
— Renato Mariotti (@renato_mariotti) August 10, 2019
