I want my frail mum to move in with me but my husband won’t agree
DEAR DEIDRE: I WOULD like my mum to move in with me but my husband won’t agree.
She has had a couple of strokes and then fell and fractured her hip.
She’s afraid of going home in case she falls again.
Mum is 80 and wants to live with me. I did care for her after her strokes but it was hard.
My husband has had a heart attack and doesn’t want her to move in. He’s 61 and I’m 59.
I’m so torn. My mum doesn’t want to go into sheltered accommodation but I feel she’s not safe to live alone.
Popular Dear Deidre problems
DEIDRE SAYS: Probably your husband worries he’ll be neglected and resentful if much of your time is spent looking after your mum.
Your mum may live many more years, so beware of damaging your relationship with him for both your sakes.
A monitored alarm system and some care could preserve Mum’s independence. My e-leaflet Help For Carers explains where to get advice before you commit.
READ NEXT IN TODAY’S DEAR DEIDRE My wife says she is not ‘in love’ with me — just a year into our marriage
READ DEIDRE’S PHOTO CASEBOOK Judi is longing for a baby but Lee has not got her pregnant yet
Get in touch with Deidre today
Got a problem? Send an email to problems@deardeidre.org. Every problem gets a personal reply, usually within 24 hours weekdays.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page.
Follow me on Twitter @deardeidre.