I am still in love with my ex-husband, though he left me 15 years ago and hates me
DEAR DEIDRE: I AM still in love with my ex-husband and dream about him, though he left me 15 years ago and hates me.
He remarried but is getting divorced again. I texted him to offer support but he ignored me. I am 42 and he is 43. We have a son aged 18 and a daughter who’s 20.
It was a nasty split. He accused me of stopping him seeing our children, which isn’t true. He got access through the court but was very unreliable about it.
He doesn’t bother with our children now, never giving them birthday presents or even Christmas cards.
They say they aren’t bothered but I know they are very hurt. I feel for them and want to tell him how much it upsets me.
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DEIDRE SAYS: What do you really want from contact with your ex? Is it about your children’s wellbeing or is it actually for yourself because you are still in love with him?
He clearly wants nothing to do with you, so you could be muddying the waters.
Ask your children what they want and be guided by that. But also talk over your own struggles to move on with a counsellor.
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