Old friend dumped me after I didn’t know what to say other than condolences

DEAR DEIDRE: ONE of my best friends seems to be dumping me now she’s been bereaved. I feel guilty.

I’m a guy and she’s female. We were pals at school but later we got involved in our careers and she moved away.

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We’d still get together twice a year. Then she married a much older man who died a couple of months ago. I sent my condolences but I didn’t know what else to say.

She has now told me and another friend that, as it’s now been six weeks without hearing from us, she doesn’t want to speak with us again. I could’ve made more effort – but so could she. We’re all 32.

DEIDRE SAYS: How sad. She’s feeling very raw but needs friends more than ever. Write an apology saying you didn’t know what to say or how to help.

Tell her you don’t want to write off your friendship and suggest when the three of you can get together. Then put an informal monthly ­­­get-together in your diaries.

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