We should have known after Tom Sandoval created an Instagram post yesterday with a filter best described as Funeral Pall to announce the closing of Schwartz & Sandy’s that something was afoot in Vanderpump Rules land. The other shoe dropped on November 26 when Bravo announced that the upcoming 12th season of the show will feature an entirely new cast. Now that we know the future of the show, let’s take a look at how it might wash out for everyone involved.
The Show Itself
In the press release announcing the news (which I’m a little shocked Bravo didn’t drop at the Miami FanFest weekend that just wrapped) it says, “Under Lisa Vanderpump’s watchful eye, the West Hollywood mainstay SUR — and now TomTom — welcomes the next batch of servers, hosts, and bartenders rife with plenty of drama, situationships, and frenemies.” That seems to open it up to being set either at the original Sexy Unique Restaurant or the spinoff TomTom. That makes sense because last time I was at SUR (about a year ago) the staff seemed mostly to be middle-aged career SUR-vers rather than the young striving hotties that we got in the Vanderpump Rules early days. Whereas when I had my last birthday party at TomTom in May (humblebrag), the staff seemed way hotter and more involved with each other in a way you would expect for a reality show.
The press release also says production will start “next year” and the cast is yet to be announced. That makes me wonder if it’s been cast at all, which then makes me wonder if they’re going to cast it and then install the people in one of Lisa’s venues rather than the other way around. This is what I’m most worried about. The reason Pump Rules became a complicated and iconic series is because it was actually a group of best friends and their boyfriends who worked at the restaurant who were doing this series as a lark for absolutely no money. They wanted to get famous but weren’t sure they would. They were just being themselves with their friends and that is what created the magic.
So far every attempt to cast a group like the Pump Rules OG — Southern Hospitality, Lindsay Lohan’s Beach Club, Vanderpump Villa — hasn’t gone well because the kids who arrive on the show don’t know each other well, really want to be famous, and are performing reality television in a way that Stassi Schroeder never needed to because she’s just a damn star. Even adding a bunch of new cast members hasn’t worked for Pump Rules in the past, so while I’m excited for new faces and new story lines, I am far more wary than excited.
Lisa Vanderpump
I was expecting that this might be the final straw that broke Ken Todd’s back and got Lisa out of the Bravo-verse forever. She took her latest show, Vanderpump Villa, to Hulu, then dragged Stassi along with her, indicating that something was amiss with her and the house Andy Cohen built. Her role on the show has lessened with each passing year, but the press release not only includes a quote from Lisa but also adds that it will happen “under her watchful eye.” But considering she just bought a huge house in Vegas where she has multiple establishments and will be filming for Hulu in France, I expect Lisa not to be around as much as she was in the early years.
Ariana Madix
The Survivor of Scandoval continues to be booked and busy, whether that’s on Broadway, hosting the American Love Island, or doing red-carpet and awards work for E!. She’s coming out of this with the brightest future, and I would be surprised if she’s one of the rare people to go from reality to a legit career elsewhere on TV. We all know she’ll be fine, maybe even better now that she never has to see her ex again.
Katie Maloney Schwartz Maloney
She has a bustling sandwich shop and a new boyfriend. I don’t know if that will be enough for Katie, but of all the kids she always seemed the least enamored with fame so I can see her riding into the sunset, doing some spots with her girl Ariana on Love Island’s aftershow, and just cashing those Something About Her checks. However, she would absolutely clear The Traitors, so if they’re casting for season four …
The Toms
We know that Schwartz & Sandy’s is about to close, but they have both been busy on other “celebrity” reality shows, including Sandoval’s upcoming stint on The Traitors. Despite the tarnish of Scandoval, they’re still an appealing duo and if Vanderpump Rules 2: The Way of Water is set at TomTom, I can see them being stand-ins for Lisa on the new iteration of the show. While the press release says it will focus on a “new group,” there is no indication if there is room for any of the old group. If anyone is coming back, I would guess it’s these two.
Lala Kent & Scheana Shay
While the fans turned on Lala after last season, both of them still have a lot of cache. They have tons of Instagram followers (2.4 million and 2 million, respectively), so they could just influence their ways into making money for their families. There have also been calls for them both to join The Valley, the Pump Rules spinoff starring Jax Taylor and Kristen Doute, who also announced today that she’s pregnant as if we don’t have enough going on already. The Valley just wrapped filming a sure-to-be-tumultuous second season featuring Jax’s messy divorce from Brittany Cartwright. They both already have deep relationships with the Valley cast and Scheana moved to the same neighborhood. Also as the only two stars who are married and have kids, it seems like a natural fit. Also, if they’re axed from Pump Rules and have to take a season off from The Valley, they could get hired back for a lot less money, which would be appealing to the bean counters at Bravo. But this might also piss off the cast of The Valley and if the second season turns out to be a blockbuster, they might not make the cut. No matter what happens, can someone promise me that I’ll still get to see Scheana’s husband, Brock Shay, in his Speedo at least once a year?
DJ James Kennedy
There is no one I worry about more than the White Kanye. Yes, his DJ career is going well, but once he is off the show does that mean the bookings dry up? Then again, as a fandom we’re still supporting Countess Luann’s cabaret show, so can we keep him on the ones and twos indefinitely? (And, not to be super cynical, but if his GF, Ally Lewber, isn’t gonna be on the show, will she stick around?) I’m worried for his general well-being, honestly.
Jax Taylor
As I mentioned above, right now he and Kristen, who were both fired from Pump Rules, are the only two currently with a show on Bravo. Does that mean that Jax Taylor is, once again, the No. 1 guy in the group?
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