Light spoilers ahead for Wicked.
Whether or not you pick up an Elphaba cold brew on your way to the theater, Wicked’s two-hour-and-forty-one-minute run time poses a challenge for the well-hydrated moviegoer. If you’re a die-hard fan of the Broadway musical the film adapts, you might be tempted to try and hold it, so as not to miss a second of the magic also known as Cynthia Erivo and Ariana Grande’s voices. But any fan with a fickle bladder needs to know one thing — without proper bathroom planning, you will pee your pants during the finale.
Fortunately for all, Wicked covers only Act 1 of its source material, meaning there is just enough padding to allow a few bathroom breaks without missing key moments, fun surprises, or any of the expanded backstories that don’t exist in the musical.
Bathroom-Break Option No. 1
If you try to use the restroom before the movie starts, but the line is way too long thanks to the Gladiator II showing that just finished next door, fear not — your first chance to escape arrives less than 20 minutes in. After you’ve enjoyed the grand entrances of the movie’s most highly anticipated faces, you’ll watch Elphaba’s family, the Thropps, arrive at Shiz University, where Elphaba’s father gives her younger sister, Nessarose, a shiny pair of new shoes that look suspiciously like the ones a certain Kansas farm girl is known to wear. When he shows Nessa the shoes in their box, you can safely step out for about four minutes without missing any major plot developments.
Bathroom-Break Option No. 2
About 45 minutes in, after Dr. Dillamond gives his class an important lesson on the history of animals in Oz. Leave once the poppies are back in the jar, and you’ll have a few minutes to relieve yourself during Madame Morrible’s private sorcery seminar. You’ll miss a brief moment where Elphaba, enraged by the incident from class, attempts to levitate a coin and proves she hasn’t yet learned how to harness her powers.
Bathroom-Break Option No. 3
Glinda’s showstopping number “Popular,” in which she gives Elphaba a makeover, is a fan favorite and high point of the movie, so the end of the song might seem like a great time to run to the loo. But if you can hold it for ten more minutes, you’ll catch an important update about the animals and a key moment between Elphaba and Fiyero — and then you can quickly duck out for the four minutes of Elphaba’s next song, “I’m Not That Girl.” It’s a shame to miss any song from Erivo, but if you really have to go, this is the acceptable choice. “I’m Not That Girl” just tells us what we already know: Elphaba is falling in love with Fiyero, and Erivo’s voice is smooth perfection.
Bathroom-Break Option No. 4
Without spoiling anything, we’ll say that you don’t want to miss Elphaba and Glinda’s arrival in Oz as they perform the song “One Short Day.” But after the pair meets the Wizard, you can probably sneak away if you’re willing to skip a couple minutes of Jeff Goldblum being charming. Start getting up when you see the yellow brick road, and you’ll probably make it back in time to hear some of “A Sentimental Man.”
Bathroom-Break Option No. 5
If you’ve neglected to take any of the earlier recommended breaks, and you’re absolutely not going to make it another half hour, then you have one last chance to run to the bathroom before leaving becomes downright disrespectful. From the moment Elphaba learns the truth about the Wizard and Madame Morrible (specifically when she says, “It’s you!”), there are about six minutes of action until the opening notes of “Defying Gravity,” the iconic number that closes Act I of the play and here serves as the finale of the film. You’ll miss a chase scene as Elphaba tries to flee the palace, some building emotional tension as Glinda chases after her, and things (literally) hitting the fan in Oz, but it’s worth it for Wicked’s big finish. I hope you’re happy — you’ve defied gravity and the consequences of your poorly planned liquid intake.
